Gas Spot #5? I Haven’t Even Showered?!


This morning I got up at 4 am. DD was feeling sick and woke me up. She went back to bed. I didn’t. So, I got up and did a load of dishes (yes, I went to bed with a sink of dirty dishes, oh, the humanity), did a load of laundry, made coffee, lit an overpowering candle and began making Banana Oatmeal Breakfast Brulee, it’s awesome by the way. Well, I moved on through the morning as usual. DD was running late for school, but the boys were completely on time. Nonetheless, we sat down to my wonderful Brulee and then I took them all to school. Because breakfast with Mom is meant to be savored, LOL, they had missed the bus. I drop off DD at her school, the boys at theirs…I’m listening to the radio and sipping on the coffee that is a faux Starbucks (this means I brewed it at home and poured it into a foam coffee cup complete with that fancy pull and lock plastic top). Basically, I’m caffeinated, full, childless until 3 and happy. Then I remember that I am out of gas. No problemo, I’ll just whiz over to my favorite early morning gas spot, right? Um, no such luck. Every station I try is out of gas. Out of all gas. I’m starting to sweat. I’ve got 19 miles left on my tank, according to the little digital readout over my head. If I spend too much time driving around looking for gas, I’ll be walking home. On the radio the news is saying that some stations have been out of gas for 3 days and don’t know when they will get more, maybe in a few days. Um, why didn’t I fill up last week?! I start realizing the gravity of my situation and this gas crisis because I am no longer able to make the considerations that make life bearable. Questions like, “Does this gas station fit my mood?”

My Gas Station Considerations:

A Mood Based Analysis


Gas spot #1 = Early Morning spot

This is where I go to hide. It is early morning and I am a SAHM. I look like hell and want no one to see me. I could be clothed in things that would end me up on a makeover show. Not that I couldn’t use some free stuff, but the humiliation I could do without. This place is close to my neighborhood, but I like to believe that I won’t run into anyone there that I know…it’s these delusions that keep me happy. In my mind this is a SAHM early morning spot and no one who has already showered would dare fill up here. We mom’s do not speak, make eye contact or pull up to a pump that is anywhere near anyone already filling up. It’s our code and we live by it.


Gas spot #2 = When I want cheap, inconvenient, bad gas

Yes, that’s right. Sometimes I go to this location because it is attached to a grocery store I frequent and is near my home. I go here when I’m heading in the right direction to get in, which also means I’m heading in the wrong direction to easily get out. I have to navigate through the parking lot and go in the direction they want me to go as I leave. Usually, it is not the direction I actually want or need to go. I also go here because their gas is cheaper than the other stations. However, their gas is terrible and is the only gas I’ve ever put in my car that really made it run badly. BTW, I’m a savant when it comes to cars. I always know what’s wrong with them…if I own them…and I’m always right. That’s just a little Joy trivia for you.


Gas spot #3 = When I want pricey, inconvenient, good gas that makes me happy

I love this little spot because it’s clean and green. Not environmentally friendly, it’s actually green. Duh, I like that color. Anyway, I go in there and always get gas that makes my car run great. Sadly, it’s another of those hard to get into almost impossible to get out of…unless you’re going in the direction they have predetermined for you. I go here when I’m in a good mood. I like the way the wind blows when I’m at this station. Really, it’ seems to always be good, breezy weather when I’m there. This is my happy station.


Gas spot #4 = When I hate everyone

I belong to all 3 wholesale clubs. If you think there are only 2, you’re not thinking of BJ’s, which is my favorite one. Well, that’s not the one I’m talking about when it comes to a regular gas haunt for me. Sadly, though I belong to BJ’s, it’s not close to me. I still make the drive, but it depresses me a bit these days since it forces me to go over a giant mud pit that used to be a gorgeous lake. Ok, it’s not totally empty, but I do now refer to it as Lake Sand Box. Anyway…

One of the wholesale clubs I belong to, I hate. I mean really, really hate. Every time I go there the first thing that comes to mind, after I check to see if I have my list and search for my club card…is how much I hate the place and can’t wait to leave. That’s before I get to the door. I try to have a better attitude, but I can’t. I also can’t deny that I’ve made some great purchases there and love to shop with them online. Hey, I bought 2 flat screen tvs, 2 computer monitors, a lap top and a huge exercise machine from them just this year. In order to do that with a good conscience though, I think of their online entity as a totally different thing. If I didn’t, I’d probably start hating my computer, just because they are accessable through it.

So, when I hate everyone and am really angry…I go here to get gas. Makes sense, doesn’t it? Yeah. Shuddup. It makes sense to me.


Gas Spot #5 = When I feel lucky, punk. = Tempting the fates…

I remember a 20/20 interview with Goldie Hawn that came on tv when I was 12. In it she said that her Dad had told her to stand in front of the ocean whenever she felt too big for her britches. I’m sure that awesome sight reels her right back in…then she tells her assistant to turn the ocean off because the noise is getting to her or something. Anyway, along those lines…

I don’t live close to the ocean, so whenever I feel too big for my britches and need to be put in my place…I visit this gas station. The awesome majesty of the dump trucks, the 18 wheelers carrying huge CAT machines, the cement mixers and other giant wheeled things barreling out of this partially obscured driveway without regard for my entry really puts me in my place.

Now, what happened today is that Gas Spot #1 was out of gas and I was unshowered AND poorly dressed. After traveling to 2 of my other stations and finding them all but shut down and completely devoid of petrol, I had to go to Gas Spot #5. Do you have any idea what that can do to a person? The station owner actually came TO MY PUMP to talk to me about the gas. He was telling me how lucky I was to have gotten there and pointing to the fuel tanker just leaving. He was the only station around with gas and had just gotten his delivery. He even talked to another SAHM! I could tell that’s what she was, we had on the same slovenly outfit. However, she didn’t look at me and we didn’t talk…hello?! We understand the code even when fate steps in and redirects the normal course of our lives. However, at times like this we all have to pull together and do things we wouldn’t normally do. Sometimes you have to confront your mortality at Gas Spot #5, when really you didn’t need to be challenged like that on that day. Maybe you were happy and wanted to go to the green, breezy station, but couldn’t because they had no gas. I know, it’s tough, but just remember how well I dealt with it and try to go on. Sometimes, we just have to do our part.

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